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NFL Red Zone: A Football Wife’s Perspective 

BEVERLY HILLS, CA – JULY 26: (L-R) Senior Coordniating Producer for ESPN’s NFL studio shows Seth Markman, Sunday NFL Countdown Host Sam Ponder and Former NFL coach & ESPN analyst Rex Ryan of ‘ESPN’s Sunday’s NFL Countdown’ speak onstage during the ESPN portion of the 2017 Summer Television Critics Association Press Tour at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on July 26, 2017 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

I’m a happily married psychologist in sunny Florida.  I treat many different disorders and oversee a large team of mental health professionals, so one might say I have seen it all.  That is, until Sundays during football season.

Setting The Lineups

Typically, the day starts off quiet at home.  My husband disappears in the mid-morning, replaced by the gentle clicking sounds of his keyboard emanating from his office. He is busy making last-minute changes to his line-up or conferring with his roto-cronies.  I hold my tongue, but I know later on, I will hear, “Why did I do that?” Classic roto regret.  

NFL Red Zone Channel

By now, my husband is locked in and mumbling something about something. It’s like being in a country where I don’t speak the language or even own a passport.  He situates himself on the couch where he will remain for the next seven hours.  I can hear the Red Zone channel countdown music as the tension starts to build.

Watching Others Talk About It All

DENVER, CO – DECEMBER 2: Scott Van Pelt, Ryan Clark, Jason Kelce and Marcus Spears broadcast live for ESPN from Monday Night Football before a game between the Denver Broncos and the Cleveland Browns at Empower Field at Mile High on December 2, 2024 in Denver, Colorado. (Photo by Justin Edmonds/Getty Images)

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t always hit the town during these hours.  Sometimes, I will pop in for the sheer entertainment of it all. Watching him watch other people talk about the games, then talking to those people who are talking about the games and thinking they are then talking back to him when, in fact, they are just people on the TV screen, is something I have come to expect on a weekly basis.

So Much Going On At Once

My husband is yelling profanities at the screen while I decide which color combinations I prefer.  I know the basics, but the screen jumps from game to game, like my own private Groundhog’s Day.  Btw, I like the Navy blue and lime green.