At this point, I think I should change the title of my weekly article from “Hunting Saves” to “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places”. That’s what it feels like these days as we are trying to find a closer for our fantasy teams. For many of us seeking true love…..I mean, the hunt for saves has been filled with a few brief moments of excitement, only to end in bitter disappointment and heartbreak.
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If you are one of the lucky few who found their true love in the draft (yes, I’m talking to you, Mason Miller owners!), you’d better make sure you appreciate that precious Prince as much as he deserves. You should wake up every day and tell him how wonderful he is, and even if he did pack on a couple of runs this past week, he’s still as beautiful as the day he came into your life. Also, kudos to you for recognizing that you couldn’t risk losing your one true love by waiting to “see how the draft developed”, and for getting down on your knee in the second or early third round to pop the question. Those of us who thought we could “do just as well” with Edwin Diaz, Jhoan Duran, or (sigh) Devin Williams are all super happy for both of you. Really.
While the Miller owners are all living their “happily ever afters”, the rest of us are just trying to find somebody to stick in our lineup for more than a week. We’re scanning the waiver wire like it’s 2 am and the bar is closing. Just when we think we’ve found our Mason Miller, we wake up the next morning next to some version of Jordan Romano and then have to pray that our friends don’t see what we did as we try to quietly end the relationship. So forgive me if I’m not as excited as I think I should be when Louie Varland walks into the room. My heart has been broken before.
I just have to remember, I chose this life and all that comes with it, and it’s not like it’s been all pure misery and frustration. I play in enough leagues that I have more than enough shares of guys like Paul Sewald, Riley O’Brien, and Dennis Santana to offset all of those Pete Fairbanks, Griffin Jax, and Bryan Pena decisions. My body count includes a few hotties like Lucas Erceg and Bryan Baker, and not just the nightmares like Romano and Cole Sands. The roller coaster ride does tend to have its ups and downs after all. Such is the life of a “saves gigolo” who likes to take his chances and play the field when it comes to looking for love.
That doesn’t mean that it’s all hopeless; we just need to temper our expectations at this stage of the game. At this point, we’re not looking for somebody to marry, but we would like some semblance of a safe relationship that won’t land us in either the poor house or a local walk-in clinic. Fear not, you aren’t in this mess alone. I’m not just here for you, I’m here with you, and I won’t stop until I can find us somebody nice to spend our FAAB on.
Good luck and happy hunting!
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